Robin Williams died Yesterday, August 11, 2014

September 17th, 2015

Well, it has actually been over a year now since this smiling face passed to the other side. Smiling on the outside, crying on the inside, I imagine he chose not to continue the pain. When the alcohol or drugs stop working what is left.The country western song goes something like; “He put the bottle to his mouth and pulled the trigger.”Do the completors understand the pain they leave behind? Probably not! My work over the years has taught me how much the mind can twist and distort reason to conclude “They would be better off without me.” Often they can’t stand the pain and despair and anquish of their life complicated by shame and a great sense of having failed.

Suicide and suicide attempts have touched my life. My brother , who I love dearly attemped several times. People that I love have lost a brother , a father and a son to suicide. It is an epidemic that seems like a way out to those who conclude their is no exit.

When suicide first occurs we enter into a shock phase. Close your eyes even now and see William’s face or the face of a love one you lost to suicide and it is difficult to imagine/accept they are gone FOREVER. We enter into our own denial state until we confront the horrible truth visually or mentally. Anger , of course, is another element of recovery. It is normal; healthy and painful to experience the impotence of our rage. It will not bring them home but we must feel it before we can get to sadness and finally our acceptance, they are gone.

We cant bring them back but we can spport those struggling with their own unspeakable pain, loss; addiction. Pay a visit, send a card say a prayer.

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Staying Connected & Our Digital “Social” Society

October 11th, 2014

How minutes, or no, hours, do you think you spend on your cellphone, computer, and other technological devices? With all of our “social” networks, many would say we are more disconnected from our relationships than we have ever been before. Technology has transformed our society in so many beneficial ways, but the danger lies in our obsession with it. I think this three and a half minute video really articulates this growing trend.

Put down your cellphone, close your computer. Call up that friend and make plans to get together. Spend that extra hour with your children. Say hi to that classmate and make conversation. We have gotten away from these personal interactions with the speed of our daily lives. Remember to make that human connection.

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A Lesson From The Dying – Brittany Maynard

October 9th, 2014

Recently in the news, stories, titled “Terminally Ill 29-Year-Old Oregon Woman: Why I’m Choosing to Die”, have been circling on social media. While many of these articles focus on the fact that Brittany Maynard is choosing to die with Oregon’s “Death with Dignity” law, that is not what I wish to focus on.

After watching her six-minute video (and wiping the tears from my eyes), the impression I was left with was a brave young woman, who is living what little life she has left, to the fullest. Not many people get the opportunity to know how long they have left to life, but it puts your priorities into prospective.

“Consider life and what’s of value is to make sure you’re not missing out… What’s important to you? What do you care about? What matters? Pursue that, forget the rest.”

Life is too short to spend time being unhappy with it. You always can make change. Brittany reminds us, whether we want to be reminded or not, of our mortality. This should be a lesson of how we should live our lives every day, so if you were to pass on tomorrow, you can know you lived your life to the best of your abilities and leave behind no regrets.

For more information on this story: Visit TheBrittanyFund.org

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Life is about the Journey, not the Destination

September 29th, 2014

Too often we get caught up in our fast-paced lives. We loose sight of our dreams or keep pushing them off for another day, but when will we say, “this is the day!”? I think this is a great poem that puts this into perspective.

“The Station”

Tucked away in our subconscious is an idyllic vision.
We are traveling by train, out the windows,
we drink in the passing scenes of children
waving at a crossing,
cattle grazing on a distant hillside,
row upon row of corn and wheat,
flatlands and valleys,
mountains and rolling hillsides
and city skylines.

But uppermost in our minds is the final destination.
On a certain day, we will pull into the station.
Bands will be playing and flags waving.
Once we get there, our dreams will come true
and the pieces of our lives
will fit together like a completed jigsaw puzzle.
Restlessly we pace the aisles,
damning the minutes – waiting,
waiting, waiting for the station.

“When we reach the station, that will be it!”
We cry. “When I’m 18.” “When I buy a new 450sl Mercedes Benz!”
“When I put the last kid through college.”
“When I have paid off the mortgage!”
“When I get a promotion.” “When I reach retirement,
I shall live happily ever after!”

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QIB: It’s All About the Way You Think

September 17th, 2014
Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.
– Robert Louis Stevenson

Who planted seeds in your life? Is their a teacher, coach, friend , doctor or family member that especially effected your life? How? Was it is by what they said or what they did? Go back to that person in your mind’s eye and remember that influence. Although the skill set they may have taught was valuable, I would guess that how they made you feel about yourself mattered..They cared enough to give you that support at a time when maybe you felt alone or unsupported Maybe they influenced you to go into medicine or teach. What message did they send you? A vote of support or confidence from a meaningful other can plant a seed.

Plant a seed today! Pay it forward unconditionally. Acknowledge someone, call someone, drop in or just put a encouraging card in the mail to someone who may be down on their luck or has recently experienced loss.

Q.I.B. is short for “quote-inspired blog”.

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Why are athletes our heroes?

September 10th, 2014

The video that the NFL and Ray Rice and the Baltimore Ravens feared would get published hit the fan . How many millions did this guys make so he can catch a football? Who in the Raven organization and the NFL knew about his anger management issues and looked the other way while he was making millions for the franchise and the NFL.Another instance of “plausable denial”. We protect our athletes because we need heroes and they in return feed our pastimes. But are these thugs really men to look up to? How many profssional athletes have histories of felony arrests and convictions? Did you see Mr. Rice’s apologies? Were you convinced they were genuine? Not me. Not 1 tear was shed. He was more worried that his multimillion dollar contract was going to be terminated. But no, instead of termination the Commissioner gave him a 2 game suspension. What a joke! He should have been arrested. Everone has something to learn from this from the local D.A. to the players themselves.
What qualities in Ray Rice could any of us say we admire? He had good hands? He was fast ? Really? Now think of someone else you really admire and their qualities. Maybe intelligence? Or they are committed to their family? Or honesty? Or they are dedicated to a cure for cancer or diabetes? But catching a football?

Then their was the old case of Tiger Woods. Yeh, he broke some barriers and he is a great golfer but do you really believe the media and his close allies did not know of his infidelities. Apparently he has a thing for blondes but so many of them and all over the place. He was protected and the secret was broke only because his wife had enough and started smashing his 9 iron into his car. We dismiss this behavior in the people we admire so what is their within us that requires such admiration at the expense of judgement .What are we missing to elevate these individuals to their iconic stature while ignoring the real heroism of , for example, Doctors Without Borders who jeopardiize their own lives to treat Ebola in West Africa?

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Seven Recommendations to Control Fat Intake

December 17th, 2013

What is fat? Are all fats bad? There are such things as good fats and bad fats. You need to be able to figure out which are the best fats to consume as well as how much you should consume. This is an important skill to help you maintain a more nutritious diet and healthier lifestyle.

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The Landfill Orchestra

November 28th, 2013

Music is something that my daughter has really brought into my life, so whenever I hear of stories like this, I just really enjoy them. This really caught my attention when a friend told me about it. It is about a group of children in Cateura, Paraguay, a town essentially built on top of a landfill, who have created instruments out of the trash they find. Together they have put together an amazing orchestra and an inspiring documentary.

“The world sends us garbage… We send back music.” Garbage collectors browse the trash for sellable goods, and children are often at risk of getting involved with drugs and gangs. When music teacher Fabio set up a music program for the kids of Cateura, they soon have more students than they have instruments. [From the Official Facebook Page of Landfill Harmonic] You can see their trailer below.

What is so impressive is how these children have nothing, yet everything.
Sometimes having too much leaves you with an empty heart and an empty home. Appreciate the value of what you enjoy and that it brings joy to others. Find something that is meaningful and fulfilling. Material things are not everything.

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